Saturday, March 31, 2007

Picture books

I realized that recently Z has started to grow out of picture books. Or at least I don't see her reading them much anymore nor do we bring them home from the library.

But I am totally not ready for that! I love picture books and I think there are plenty of great picture books out there and would still be lovely and appropriate for Z.

With that in mind I went ahead and bought her a few picture books at the second hand store yesterday. I was also thinking that it has almost two years since I have gone through the fiction picture book section at our library. I think I need to look through them at least one last time before we move on.

And even though Z is reading Inkheart I think she still enjoys a good picture book.

Fun Day




Pere made baked French toast with sliced apples and bacon for breakfast. Yum!

Then he worked with Z on the "four questions" that she needs to know in Hebrew for Passover this Monday. Then we played Apples to Apples and then Chutes and Ladders.

Z played with the granddaughter of a neighbor for a little while and later we watched another episode of Planet Earth (a great new series on Discovery)

Then Pere took us hiking in the hills near his work






When we got home we went swimming for a bit at the pool.

After that I read to Z a few new books I just bought her

Tooth School

and a picture book about ants.

Now she is in her room making up a play to perform for us.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Favorite thing Z said today

"Mommy, I just want to lie on the couch under the blanket and snuggle and talk"

*warm smile*

I mentioned to some other friends today that I am really shocked by how well EPGY is going for Z.

She started 3rd grade 2 months ago (when she just turned six). She has almost finished it and it has been very easy for her. She is consistently scoring 98% - 100%. I was wondering how long 4th grade might take for her. Twice as long? Three times? Even so it could be that she starts 5th grade when she is only six and that idea shocked me.

I know that Z scored highest on the non-verbal/ visual spatial portion of her I.Q. test but I guess the implications of that hadn't really sunk in until last night.

*******************

I had another somewhat surprising moment yesterday when I was looking Z's acting resume. Under "Special Skills" besides "speaks Japanese (beginner)", "swimming" and "recites Shakespeare" it also said "Reads at 5th grade level.

That part of the resume was made last summer when she was reading at a higher level but I wanted to be somewhat modest and I figured 5th grade was good enough and that was the level of her favorite book. Well, if I had to write that resume now I think I would say "Reads at an adult level".

I guess there really isn't much of a difference between 5th grade and adult level - most "adult level" books seem more like 8th grade level to me. Also Z is used to reading old books written 60 - 70 years ago and the language used in children's books then was much more complex than I see in many "adult" type fiction books these days. (Isn't that weird?" )

Reading is easy though. The only things that hold Z back from reading anything is life experience. She wouldn't read most adult level books because she wouldn't find the material personally meaningful.

*******************

Still she is just a little girl and very normal in many ways. A friend wrote me this after taking Z out to lunch yesterday:
(the questions are from conversation starter cards set at the table)

Question, what is one thing that you really want to learn how to do?
Z said, Fly
I said, oh yeah, you want to be an astronaut when you grow up.
She said, no, I mean that I want to fly with my arms.

Question, if you could donate $100,000 to any charity, what would it be?
Z said she would plant trees to give the fairies a place to live.

Question, who is you favorite female athlete?
Z said her imaginary friend.

Question, what is the most beautiful animal?
Z said a pegasus, because they have a white glow around them and they can wear jewelry.

And of course, what will you be like in ten years and where will you be?
Z said that she would be a fairy princess and live in a castle.

*hee hee*

Thursday, March 29, 2007

homeschool... Not!

I love all the homeschooling we have been doing but we haven't gotten much done this week.

Monday she was with her grandmother, Wednesday she had her Shakespeare play, today she went to the American Girl Place for a birthday party and tomorrow we have two play dates.

Tuesday was the only day she really did any "schooling."

Weeks like this don't really stress me out though. In the grand scheme of things one week here and there aren't going to keep her out of college.

************

I have been doing some research on finding a music mentor for Z. I have a few leads now.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Taming of the Shrew, acting and piano



Z had her performances of Taming of the Shrew today.

It went pretty well. She was good in pretty much every scene she was in, but at one point she was confused about when she was supposed to go onstage (they had not made it clear and/or had made so many changes recently she got confused) she tried to ask someone but didn't get a clear answer so she was frustrated and worried when she entered. She looked like she was going to cry.

The second performance was much better though and I think Z had more fun with it.

A lot of little kids that Z plays with at the park came to watch and I heard one of them say "That little one is Z. She's my friend"

Next year there are going to be three Shakespeare groups and based on age Z would be with the 4 - 7 year olds. But one of the directors wrote me to say that Z should be in the 8 - 11 yo group.

So I sat through her two performances and the older kid's play, Romeo and Juliet. Z watched R & J with me and was very sad when Mercutio died.

******************

Monday when I picked Z up from her gramdmere's house I asked her if she wanted to keep doing any professional acting (movies, t.v., commercials, print or voice overs) and she said "Not really."

Then Tuesday her agency called and asked if she would come in to do a voice over audition for an animated movie. I told them I would have to get back to them. Then I asked Z about it and she said, quite brightly 'Sure, that could be cool!"

Voice overs are cool and they are the easiest to audition for, she can do it right in the sound studio at her agency.

So we went there that evening. On the way there I felt the stress return and I was thinking that I really don't want to get back into this. I don't think I am really even willing to do it just for voice overs.

*****************

Z is a very musically inclined child. But I am not sure her piano teacher is the right one for her. One problem is that I think what Z really needs is a music mentor not just a piano teacher. Also I think only learning classical piano is too limiting.Z loves all kinds of music.

I just feel like she would really love to learn music more holistically. I am not sure if what I am looking for really even exists.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Firefly Main Theme

So yesterday I got a new cell phone.

Today I got into a car accident.

I'm okay and Zoe is okay and the person I got into the accident with is okay and are cars aren't too damaged. But I am still shaken. What if it had been worse?

Other than that I am trying to download a new ringtone for my phone. For the past two years I have had the song from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban "Double Double Toil and Trouble... Something Wicked This Way Comes!" Do you know the song?

Before that I had "When I'm Sixty-Four" for a couple years.

It is very hard for me to choose a ring tone because I feel like it is very personal and that it had to fit me just right.

So tonight while the Laker's lost to the Grizzleys I was going over the music that I own trying to figure out what song best represents me in the form of a cell phone.

I have narrowed it down to six songs and I am going to try them each for a couple of days to see which one makes me happiest (this reminds me now of my friend who is often changing her blog :))

Tomorrow I have the theme song from Joss Whedon's Firefly - http://www.fireflywiki.org/img/Ballad_of_Serenity.mp3

Monday, March 26, 2007

More pictures from our trip

We walked around town and rode our bikes in the hills


the farmers market


a festival at the library



we brought our bikes


we found a car show


Look! A Delorean!


Cairns in a field


Getting ready to go out for dinner


the oak tree at night


our balcony door this morning

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Anniversary trip

Pere and I observed our wedding (and dating) anniversary earlier this month but this weekend is our romantic getaway trip.

We are in the small town of Ojai and staying at a bed and breakfast there. Today we had a cooking class. Here are some pictures:



The yard


Pere cooking

Broccoli Rabe


Raspberry Tiramisu


Happy Cookers


The Meal - Italian comfort foods - 3 types of pizza made from scratch, lasagna with putanesca sauce, roasted peppers and mushrooms, Broccoli Rabe, and Raspberry Tiramisu.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Field Guide

This morning before snuggle time Z ran to get our field guide. She said she just had to look something up. She read through it for awhile, she said she wanted to look up the seeds she found yesterday but also found a section on the phases of the moon and the constellations.

Then she cuddled up in my lap and asked if we could take turns reading the field guide to each other.

Is that weird?

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Spring

I have kept Z home from her classes (voice, japanese and gymnastics) today again because she is still all congested. But that didn't stop us from homeschooling. We actually got a lot done - EPGY, two sheets of geography homework, two science movies and quizzes on Brainpop, some spelling rules practice, reading about Castles for history and Aesop and folktales for literature, and played a game of chess.

She also did a calligraphy art project - she decided to do a cover for her Super Cell story with quill and ink (she did finish editing the story, so I can send it to Ami)





Wow today is such a beautiful day!

Yesterday it didn't seem like spring here but today it does.


Today the pine trees are raining down their seeds


There is a layer of pollen all over everything


Z wanted to collect some of the seeds and things she was looking at


ahhh....


the Koi in the pond look happy about it


the flowers are blooming


Z wanted to stick her feet in the pool and air dry them


My spring chick


We glued her nature findings to a peice of paper

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

husband talk

The other night when we were getting ready for bed I asked Pere "What outfits do you think I look cute in?", as I was planning to meet some friends for dinner and wanted to look nice

He said "You look nice in sun dresses."

Me, "Um, well it is cold and it will be night time... so the sun dress is out. What else do you like?"

He was so nice to look through my clothes in the closet and say he liked my long-sleeve t-dye shirt. He was right, that is a cute shirt.

Then I asked him "Which shoes do you think will look good."

"He said, "Um, your Doc Martens."

"Really?" I asked.

"No, those are just the only shoes you have that I know the name of."

LOL.

Still sick

Z is still sick. But today was her last rehearsal for her play so we had to go.



Here she is in her Biondello costume.




Here she is with some of the other girls, including Kate (far left) and Bianca (far right).



Z's cast is also going to be in the battle scene of the older student's play of Romeo and Juliet. Here they are practicing their sword play.

We hung around at the park for a little while but we didn't stay the whole time that we usually do.

I brought Z home around 2:00 and gave her a hot bath and she stayed in there for over an hour, talking and singing to herself.

Now she is watching a British version of the Lion, the witch and the wardrobe.

I have to cancel her classes for tomorrow too. *sigh* I hope she gets better soon.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Poor Sweet Baby



So Z is sick again. :(

I cancelled a playdate and dinner with a friend and math class (she did do science because it was her turn to present). I can't keep her home tomorrow because it is her last rehersal before her Shakespeare performance.

But today I brought her home early and told her she could read or rest in her bedroom. Around 3:30 she was fast asleep.

Monday, March 19, 2007

The Moon

Today Z worked on her presentation for her science class. This term the kids are all presenting on some aspect of space. Z is doing her's on the moon.

I really liked all the topics there were to choose from, constellations, physics of space, planets, space exploration, and the moon. We would have learned a lot of any one of them.

Did you know that most of the moon's of Uranus are named after characters from Shakespeare's plays?

The Adventures of Super Cell

For my friends that got Z's first draft;

If you haven't read it, dont. Z wanted to edit it today and I think it is going to make a lot more sense. She is fixing the confusing parts where she uses too many pronouns. :)

I will post when she is done.

Thx

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Fear not young lady!

"For I am Super Cell!"

Tonight, right at bedtime, Z came to me said "I have an idea for a story about a Super Cell and his adventures inside the human body. It goes like this..."

Then she preceded to dictate a four page story about Super Cell and his Sidekick Robin and their battle with Ekla and his band of Germs for the brain of the girl Lavender.

It is too long to post here but here is an excerpt:

But then Ekla threw the brain high into the air.

But Lavender’s mother, who had some gloves on, grabbed it. Then she looked at it and screamed. “This is Lavender’s brain! No wonder she fainted! Uck, I wish I had someone to put it back in.”

Right them in a booming voice Super Cell said, “Fear not young lady! For I am Super Cell! And I shall return it to its rightful place!”


and another funny party

And Super Cell said “Grlbbgrwlbggrbblw”

But then Robin, who is talented in gymnastics, did a super flip and landed right into the stomach. Acids were pouring on him like rain! All colors, pink, blue and yellow. But without taking any notice at all he said, “Super Cell, wait up!”

Then he saw the brain floating (he was also a very good swimmer) and then with a great rush he swam as fast as he could with his eyes closed and his hands out until he felt the brain. Then he swam up. Although it took him three minutes (the stomach is pretty deep) it seemed like forever. And then he saw a breathless body floating down. He said “On no, not again!”

Friday, March 16, 2007

Friday

Boy, I am glad the weekend is here.

We don't really have any plans per se and that is the best part. We might go bike riding on our new bikes. Or maybe we will go down to the beach.

Z votes for staying home and watching cartoons. *grin* She always is such a homebody. The only plans we have are to play Equate, which is like Scrabble but with math.

Z also has a new favorite TV show, the animated show The Tick and my graphic novel of it is her new favorite book.

The book gave her the idea to make her bedroom her Super-Hero Hideout. She drew a picture of a computer screen and taped bubble wrap to the bottom to be a keyboard. She drew a place to type in her keyboard her "Full name" and "Password" and then she drew her "Symbol' and taped that up. Then she said she needed a "rocket" so I told her to use a cardboard box (those come in handy in so many ways) so she taped a blown up red balloon to the back to be fire and drew on it and decorated it and made herself a rocket.

hee hee

She is so cute. I love that it is The Tick that is inspiring all thing because it is a hilarious show. :) For those of you who know the Tick I am going to end this post with "Spoooooon!"

p.s. Tonight she hit another milestone. She asked me to turn the hall light off and shut her door most of the way so it was more dark. I know I was way older before I would sleep in the dark.

Commercial!

Z's Neosporin commercial is up on This site.

On the right hand side of the screen is a window that says "watch our latest commercial"

I clicked it and then it opened up a window which opened up another window in "windows media player"

But anyway, here it is.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Pics Finally!

Blogger had been troubling me the last few days about posting pictures. So here are some from the past few days.


Z and Clementine at Build a Bear (friends B-Day party). Why does Z look so sad?


Working on her new art project - Action Painting (like Pollack)


"Mommy! I'm all done!"


This is my favorite, sitting in a box.

This was Monday or Tuesday and Pere went to her room to get her for her piano practice. A moment later he came back without her and said "Eh, she is so cute. I don't want to disrupt her play"

I am sure I rolled my eyes at him or something. So I got up to get her and I saw her looking so sweet and young talking to her dolls sitting inside a cardboard box. I too was struck down by the cuteness. Z ended up practicing after dinner.


This picture is from today. She was playing dress up. The rest of the outfit was just a shawl, a tutu and a little red basket.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

So many opportunities

So someone in our homeschool group is starting a Rockestra (Rock band/ Orchestra) for homeschoolers and I was thinking of letting Z audition for singing (chorus or back-up singer.)

There is also an engineering class coming up using LEGO's.

Then there are book clubs and history club and science classes and chess class and Shakespeare and a homeschool friendly dance studio and more.

It all sounds good. :) But I really want to keep Z's free time.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Record Keeping

I thought I would share what we do for record keeping.

Earlier this school year I developed a Word document that I use daily for keeping track of what homeschooling we are doing.

It looks like this:

Date _._._

Math (each with two lines for writing on)
Reading
Writing
Lang. Arts
Science
Geography
History
Piano
Art
Japanese
Visual Spatial
Singing
P.E.
Computer
Field Trips

At the beginnig of the week I print out five of these sheets and then I keep it with me during the day and fill it in as we do things.

I plan our curriculum by term and by week. The term is the overview of what subject matter we are going to cover and I keep track of what resources I am using with virtual post-it notes on my laptop's desktop screen. I also use these post-it notes for listing which resources I want to use each week.

I make all sorts of lists on these "stickies".

For example, I recently checked out a book of fun activities with a Medieval theme from the library. It has 50 activities and upon perusing it, I found I would like to do about six of them. So I make a sticky with the title of the book and then list of activity and page number for the ones I want to try.

I also use stickies to keep lists of Visual Spatial activities that Z can do:
Kidpixx
Tetris
Rush Hour
Chess
Legos
Magnetix
Kinex
drawing
tangrams
puzzles
mazes
patterns
drawing maps
origami
sculpting
3 dimentional object contruction - clay

So, I use stickies to list the things I want to do and my Daily Learning Checklist, which is a physical piece of paper, for the thigns we have actually done. I keep the DLC in a folder. It has been very useful on numerous occasions to be able to refer to these records.

Lasy year I kept a similar daily list but I didn't print it out and I have found I am less likely to refer to it when it is a matter of having to open all these word documents rather than just flipping pages in a notebook.

Monday, March 12, 2007

so-so

Yesterday had it's good parts and it's bad parts.

The bad was Z arguing wth me about how to rewrite her final draft story about her future self. And then arguing with me again about her reading aloud voice. Both of these episodes ended with her trying to arguing over me speaking and then crying when I am very firm about what is going to happen.

But we also went bike riding for over an hour and worked on her first art project (abstract, inspired by Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody) and finished another chapter of Kind Arthur. Those were all good things.

**********

My daughter wakes up singing. I mean I would call myself a morning person but because of my low blood sugar issues I am not fit for company until I have had some protein (and coffee) but my girl gets up singing. Yes, she is the kind of morning person who is able to sing disco tunes Very Loudly before the sun has even come up. :)

I"m a Supahstah!

Or so says Z. And I swear she has never seen that SNL skit.

Here she is (just a little bit) in the PGA Golf Superstore commercial.

http://www.pgatoursuperstore.com/sub_comm_sand.asp

Enjoy!

the commercial

a neighbor just called me to tell me she saw Z in the Neosporin commercial when she was watching Good Morning America!

I told Z and she said "Cool! I just made more money!" *heh*

Friday, March 09, 2007

Art curriculum


So I have been searching around the last week for an art curriculum for Z. Today, at the bookstore, I found Art, and A - Z guide

It is not what I thought I was looking for. But perhaps it is even better.

The book has 59 art terms like balance, Cubism, landscape, mural, perspective, proportion, Romanticism, Surrealism, and symmetry. Each word has two pages with examples both famous and not. Amoung the 225 pictures there are works of art from every continent and time period.

My idea is to read through the book and have Z create her own book using the same words but illustrating the book with her own original art, which will include cartoon art, computer graphics, mosaics, photography and (maybe if we are really over-achieving) tapestry.

I am really really excited about this. This will give Z the art education I really want for her. With this Z will be able to see so much more at our trips to the Getty museum.

The Sound of Music

I just plugged my iPod in and download 500 of my favorite songs. The first songs to play themselves were from Mozart's Requiem. I friggin love blasting to Confutatis (that is a song that needs to be blasted) and not worrying that I am giving my daughter hearing damage or angering the neighbors. :)

Z is off with her grandparents. Pere and I slept in and then walked to the theatre and saw the oh so romantic movie, Zodiac and then came home and took a nap and then rollerbladed to the bookstore. We have been having a really nice time. :)

Ooooh! Happy Anniversary!


(click on the picture to see it bigger)

Tomorrow is our anniversary. Look at what Pere gave me at midnight tonight!

The card is so sweet. And check out the homemade wrapping paper! Pere made it himself, it says Happy anniversary "Mere" , love "Pere" in Binary (1's and 0's). Isn't he the cutest thing ever!

Then he also got me an i-Pod! I am really surprised!

And I played my favorite anniversary song for him - The Flintstones Anniversay Song or Listen to it here .

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Grown Up Talk

Have I mentioned how much I love my homeschooling group? I have, haven't I? Well I really do.

Today I had thought provoking conversations with many of my friends there. We discussed some parenting, of course, but also we talked about sex, religion and politics (ah my favorite subjects.) We all had different opinions and I think everyone respected everyone else. I really appreciate my friends there.

***********

Z's cold has made her voice scratchy and lower and jeez she really sounds like a teenager when she talks. She already often speaks in an adult manner but she has a little baby voice. The way she sounds now I feel it is like looking into the future and it is kind of weirding me out.

**********

Today Z was playing "X-treme Basketball!" with Pere (every game Z plays ends up being "X-treme"!) and she cried "Give me back my ball you notorious villian!"

Pere asked where she even heard that term and she said "From Shakespeare! From Taming of the Shrew"

Well at least she is learning something...

*********

My Mere sent Z some presents today. They are just perfect for her.


Three new minerals - they are BIG! - quartz crystals, rose quartz and amethyst from a geode.


a teeny tiny teacup set


A Secrets Box just for her and a new fairy doll.

Thanks Mere!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

reason #47

This morning Z had her I.Q. tested (again.) This time by the local school district. If I ever have to put her back into free (public) school for a short time (knock on wood) then she will be able to go into the gifted program.

I dropped her off and did a couple errands in the neighborhood and then 2 hours later they called me to come pick Z up.

I talked to the tester and I asked her if Z's cold seemed to effect her focus. She said that Z did very well. But she said that Z seemed to have a hard time sitting still and asked if I had ever "seen" anyone about that. As in like a pyschologist I guess.

I told her that when Z was first tested at four the psychologist said that Z does not have ADD. Then this tester today said that Z's need for moving about didn't seen to hamper her test taking ability today but that it might be more problematic in the future.

I understood that she was referring to problems that would arise if I ever tried to put Z in regular school.

Uh, yeah... no kidding.

I know Z would get in trouble in a regular school for not being able to sit still at her desk for hours on end. That is reason number forty-seven that I do not want to send Z to school.

Reason number forty-eight is that Z would probably get in trouble for talking too much too, like I did.

Reason number forty-nine is that Z would probably get in trouble for arguing with the teacher and get written up like I used to: "Has problems with authority."

I wanted to get Z tested in the system cause you never know when that might be useful, but I have a long list of reasons why I will not be sending Z to public school. Homeschooling just works so much better for us.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

All better

Friday night I brought Z’s mattress into my bedroom so I could watch over her while she slept. I was worried about her fever getting worse.

I became more worried about her when she woke up in the middle of the night having some kind of hallucination. She was crying out to “stop!” and hold her hands out in front of her. Her eyes were open and she was looking about but she wasn’t really seeing what was there.

This had happened once before when she was younger and also running a fever.

I took her out our room and into the restroom and took her temperature and gave got her to drink some water. She woke up and got clear-headed enough to tell me that in her “dream” someone was threatening to poke her in the chest.

I asked her if someone had ever done that to her, like a kid at the park. She said no.

She went back asleep but a couple hours later she woke up with the same hallucination. She was crying out and waving her hands in front of her. :( It was really sad.)

But the fever had broke by morning and we took it easy yesterday. We taught her to play Monopoly and introduced her to the new Dr. Who.

I let her sleep in my room again last night and she slept soundly through the night. Today, other than not having her normal unlimited supply of energy, she seems much better.

Friday, March 02, 2007

How you know when your child is sick

1. She cries when she can't have "a real fun time" reading a rocks and minerals book with her friend.

2. She cries because she doesn't want to ride her with her mommy on their new tandem to the bank.

3. At the bank instead of playing in the Kid's Center she curls up on a chair and closes her eyes.

4. She askes if she can "rest her eyes" in the car on the way back from the bank.

5. After she is tucked under and blanket and watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone she asks "Is it okay if I don't talk? It makes my throat hurt."

6. She is given a scoop of ice cream and can only eat half of it.

7. She almost cries out of worrying that her milk might spill even though it has not come close to spilling.

*sad face*

I guess we will not be going to the Keep Los Angeles Beautiful event at City Hall tomorrow. I suppose I will just have to busy myself with babying my poor baby. :)

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Art

So yesterday Z had her Girl's Club and as usual they did some kind of art project. Yesterday they actually just painted on paper which was fun for all the girls. I did notice though that Z's painting were kind of blobby. She is not very comfortable with painting because it is not something we often do.

I feel bad to admit that when something has to give at Gray's Academy it is usually art.

Last night I was rationalizing this by telling myself that Z's curriculum includes a lot of things most kids aren't studying, like a foriegn language, a music instrument, theatre, voice, and gymnastics. If we weren't doing all those things I am sure we would have time for art - but we can't do everything!

But then I realzed that one of the things that is holding me back from doing much art in our curriculum is my own dismal art educaiton. Z and I are both interested in artists and are moved by art. I loved art history when I took it in college. But the technical aspect of teaching how to make art is something I have to learn along side Z.

Well, except drawing. I draw pretty well and so does Z. And I admit that _most_ of our "art" is pencil drawings. But painting it a whole different skill set, IMO. I had a pretty good book series I was using to teach art to Z about Impressionism. But I guess it wasn't good enough to really keep us going back to it. I am wondering if maybe we should take art lessons together?

Z said...

This morning Z was writing the date on some work and she said "Whoa! Today is the first of March already!" and then she said " I guess that means I'll go back to doing my acting in only one month."

I shrugged and said "Only if you want to."

She responded "Well, now that I have my normal life back I kinda of want to keep doing that."

I said "That is totally fine."

She said with a worried voice "That is probably not fine to my agent."

I shrugged again and said "I am sure it is fine. But you don't have to worry about that anyway."

Sooooo, it looks at this point that Z is making the choice not to go back.