Looking back

Yesterday's Stomp session got me thinking about Z's natural inclination towards music and performing arts.

She has many things that she loves, some are foreign languages, physics, nature, her I Love Math books, and reading (of course).

But when she was 3 she wasn't memorizing the names of dinosaurs, or heavenly bodies, but poetry. She was so into poetry that I even made that her online name. She had memorized Halfway Down the Stairs when she was 2 or 3. And went on to memorize many others.

She was making up poems then too. There was one I was looking for but I guess I only have it written down at home. It was the second one I remember writing down and she wrote it when she was two or early three. But I did find this one that she wrote at three:

Daffodils grow in my tender soul, I tend to them and watch them grow.

She was always coming up with stuff like that. I should have written more of them down. Soon the poems turned into songs.

At that same age (2 - 3) she was really really into musicals. She would insist on listening to the same ones over and over and was able to memorize them and sing them. Here is her singing from Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical

And the things she did back then that really freaked me out were more often coming from a talent that is realted to musical memory. Like her recognizing incidental music from the Harry Potter score played over the speakers at a toy store, after only seeing the movie twice, and being able to remember what was happening in the movie when that music was being played.

Sure, she was also starting to reading. And also insisting on doing 30 - 40 minutes of math and Spanish. And wanting me to read her everything. But when I look back I think I can see a stronger connection in music and performing than in anything else except reading.

She was not the kid who drew all the time or who built with blocks all day. But the toddler who would bring sheet music to bed for reading material. She was the three year old that memorized all of Les Miserables.

On one hand I have tried to be supportive about the musical stuff. I got her a really good piano teacher and voice teacher and I have also tried to set her up with fun situations for acting. But in my heart I was never really comfortable with the idea that she might want to make a career out of it. I could see that she would be good at it. But I feel like science or even foreign languages would be safer.

I don't know if that means I am going to be making any changes. There are some I have in mind. But looking back I am able to see this thread of passion and talent that may be stronger than the others. And I am looking at her now and seeing that the only thing she does every day on her own, other than read, is sing. I have been unwiling to admit what that might mean about where her future happiness might lie.

But I decided last night that I need to be more open to the idea that Z might find the most joy in her life performing.

That is all. I just going to be more open to the idea in my own heart and mind.